Yeah... well... I'm terrified of them. Really terrified. [Her arm coiled around Asuka and pulled her in closer, both eyes closed. She swallowed.] I'm glad you got through the dreams ok either way...
is this one of those "It could have been worse" moments for both of us?
[As Asuka was pulled in, she'd nuzzle against Samantha just a little bit. It felt good to be this close after all the unpleasantness of the last few weeks.]
It sure seems that way. I imagine things are only going to get worse from here out to. [Asuka sighed.] I've got to stay strong though. I need to get back home in one piece.
Probably a bit, but... I remember the siege. Most of it's going to be open warfare, not these head game things. A straight up fight's a lot easier to deal with than having your head messed with if you ask me.
[She sighed softly, her other arm reaching down to curl around Asuka. She had forgotten after years of lacking them how much hugs could help someone's mood. They were... a little addictive at times.]
I know. Between these dreams and the Angel that took my eye, trust me, I know.
[Asuka sounded serious for a moment, and even a bit depressed. That was her worst moment after all, and made her hold herself all the tighter to Samantha.
A moment later, she would attempt to move into just such a position to be able to kiss her without awkwardly contorting her body like a snake. In the end, she'd most likely settle just in front of Samantha.]
[The kiss was easy to get. Samantha squirmed a little herself to help enable it. Words were perfectly good for comfort at times, if you were good at that sort of thing, but she also knew that she had a ghoulish habit of saying the wrong thing and Asuka had enough problems. So, sucking on the bottom of her lip and pulling her in flush seemed a better solution for a moment.
She didn't pull away, though this close it wouldn't be possible not to notice if Asuka opened her one good eye. After all, with the way their heads turned...]
[Asuka indulged herself in Samantha's kiss for a short while, eye closed and mind blank. It was hard to think about what she had lost, or anything much else for that matter, when she was locked in embrace with her girlfriend.
But that same eye would have to open eventually, to at least take in the girl she was locking lips with. That is when she would finally take notice of the oddity of Samantha's eye.]
Hey, Samantha. Has your eye always looked like that?
[Asuka didn't think so, she knew Samantha's appearance well, and what was going on with her eye was not normal. It did not hurt to ask though.]
[She swallowed and looked uncomfortable, turning away a little.]
No, it's not working quite right anymore. I can still see, but only just barely. My depth perception's taken a bit of a hit.
[Of course, given that she'd explained to quite a few what 'things not working quite right' meant, two and two might have equalled four on this one, depending on what Asuka was thinking.]
Its tail got too close. I got scared and it slammed into me like a wall of water when I lost my grip. I... blacked out from the pressure and woke up in the castle.
Pretty damned sure I died, but for once I didn't have to feel it all.
You died?! Why the hell didn't you tell me that in the first place!
[Asuka was more the a bit sensitive about people dying ever since she had seen her mother died in front of her at a mere eight years of age. Since then she had endured nearly everyone she had ever cared about leave or betray her in the end.
And even though Samantha was still very much here, something about her saying it so casually struck a sore spot that caused tears to begin to flow from Asuka's uncovered eye.]
I've seen enough people I love die on me. I don't want to think about the same damn thing happening to you to.
Because I had a feeling you might react like this. I've... died a lot of times, Asuka. Not just here, but at home. I...
[She swallowed, scratching at the back of her head and very obviously uncomfortable. She didn't like talking about it, but really she was very casual about death all things considered.]
I don't like people I love thinking about me dying, about the ways or times I did. I'd rather just move on. I got stupid and let it get too close. It will be fine... I promise.
[Asuka brushed the tears from her cheek and tried her best to compose herself. She rarely showed this level of emotion to anyone and returning to her natural state of stoic calm would take more then a few minutes.]
Ok...I trust you. Just tell me next time something like this happens! I promise I won't freak out again... maybe.
[It was also only after she had taken a few moments to calm down that she realized just what she had said. Well crap.]
Um...er, I do mean what I said to, about loving you.... Just don't make me repeat it. It's sort of embarrassing.
[She swallowed and sighed loudly before nodding and putting her forehead against Asuka's. Relationships were hard. She wasn't sure about agreeing to this, but every death had unavoidable effects now for her...]
Ok, I will. I promise. I... just don't want to hurt you. And don't worry. You don't have to say it over and over again. I know.
...Neither of us is good at this, Asuka. You don't have to try to be. I didn't choose you because you were great at this sort of thing. I don't fall for those people.
[Asuka leaned in a bit, press her own forehead against that of the demon girl. Being this close made it a bit easier to focus on things besides death and her own massive trust issues.]
You don't have to rub it in. [Asuka laughed awkwardly.] But I know and I'm happy that your willing to put up with me like this. I appreciate it.
[And a kiss on the forehead, to make up for the one that had been interrupted by depressing talk earlier.]
[mmm, when Asuka kissed her forehead, the girl's neck craned and head tilted so that she could brush lips again. She'd never been one for forehead kisses, after all. Smiling sadly while she hovered and touched lips lightly, she let her eyes flutter.]
Not put up with. I like some of these things about you. A lot. Normal's boring.
[All of this physical affection was something that Asuka had went from mildly dreading, to quite enjoying over the time since she first began seeing Samantha.
The Eva pilot offered another kiss, this time on the lips, just lingering for a moment before pulling away to speak.]
I don't think I'd even know what it felt like to be normal. So I guess that is a good thing.
This is new for me to, you know! I've never date anyone up till now, so everything we've done together has been something I haven't ever done before. It's been a little awkward sometimes...but yeah we'll get through the rough stuff to.
[It is a bit hard to think of someone as having died if your currently cuddling with them on the coach.]
[She chuckled very softly, one hand dragging her claws very lightly along the side of her head, just behind the aw. She liked it up close like this. It was warm... and a little nice to have the scent of her this close. It made her hungry, always hungry, but she was getting used to that yearning.]
I'm such an awful person, stealing all your firsts like this. And I don't even regret a moment of it anymore.
[Asuka's body tingled a bit at the touch, she just couldn't help herself. True, these encounters had lost a bit of their shiny newness over time, but it did not change the fact that this was something Asuka had come to enjoy over time.
That last comment however, caused Asuka's stare in confusion at Samantha As she wondered just what the demon girl meant by that.]
Does that mean there was a time you did regret it?
[That sort of phrasing does beg the question, and Asuka was not one to let that sort of notion slide without an answer.]
[Asuka sighed a bit, feel a little like an ass for having asked. She remembered back when things weren't like they were now. She didn't mind the arrangement. But it was just...different, to say the least. She liked the present far more, much as she had admitted in a sob during her confession sometime back.]
It was fine. It was a little awkward on my part, but I enjoyed myself and we have a good thing going now. So don't worry about it.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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3/10/14 01:54 (UTC)[Asuka sat beside Samantha and laid against her slightly, not quite nuzzling up to her but still an affectionate gesture.]
Not really a nightmare, but still not something I'd ever want experience again. But its over now, and I'm glad your back.
Re: [Action]
3/10/14 02:18 (UTC)is this one of those "It could have been worse" moments for both of us?
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3/10/14 02:24 (UTC)It sure seems that way. I imagine things are only going to get worse from here out to. [Asuka sighed.] I've got to stay strong though. I need to get back home in one piece.
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3/10/14 15:32 (UTC)[She sighed softly, her other arm reaching down to curl around Asuka. She had forgotten after years of lacking them how much hugs could help someone's mood. They were... a little addictive at times.]
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3/10/14 15:46 (UTC)[Asuka sounded serious for a moment, and even a bit depressed. That was her worst moment after all, and made her hold herself all the tighter to Samantha.
A moment later, she would attempt to move into just such a position to be able to kiss her without awkwardly contorting her body like a snake. In the end, she'd most likely settle just in front of Samantha.]
Re: [Action]
3/10/14 17:38 (UTC)She didn't pull away, though this close it wouldn't be possible not to notice if Asuka opened her one good eye. After all, with the way their heads turned...]
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3/10/14 17:48 (UTC)But that same eye would have to open eventually, to at least take in the girl she was locking lips with. That is when she would finally take notice of the oddity of Samantha's eye.]
Hey, Samantha. Has your eye always looked like that?
[Asuka didn't think so, she knew Samantha's appearance well, and what was going on with her eye was not normal. It did not hurt to ask though.]
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3/10/14 21:37 (UTC)No, it's not working quite right anymore. I can still see, but only just barely. My depth perception's taken a bit of a hit.
[Of course, given that she'd explained to quite a few what 'things not working quite right' meant, two and two might have equalled four on this one, depending on what Asuka was thinking.]
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3/10/14 22:10 (UTC)How the heck did that happen? Did you get cursed or something?
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4/10/14 02:56 (UTC)[Sigh. She turned a deep shade of red.]
Its tail got too close. I got scared and it slammed into me like a wall of water when I lost my grip. I... blacked out from the pressure and woke up in the castle.
Pretty damned sure I died, but for once I didn't have to feel it all.
Re: [Action]
4/10/14 03:06 (UTC)[Asuka was more the a bit sensitive about people dying ever since she had seen her mother died in front of her at a mere eight years of age. Since then she had endured nearly everyone she had ever cared about leave or betray her in the end.
And even though Samantha was still very much here, something about her saying it so casually struck a sore spot that caused tears to begin to flow from Asuka's uncovered eye.]
I've seen enough people I love die on me. I don't want to think about the same damn thing happening to you to.
Re: [Action]
4/10/14 03:09 (UTC)[She swallowed, scratching at the back of her head and very obviously uncomfortable. She didn't like talking about it, but really she was very casual about death all things considered.]
I don't like people I love thinking about me dying, about the ways or times I did. I'd rather just move on. I got stupid and let it get too close. It will be fine... I promise.
Re: [Action]
4/10/14 03:17 (UTC)Ok...I trust you. Just tell me next time something like this happens! I promise I won't freak out again... maybe.
[It was also only after she had taken a few moments to calm down that she realized just what she had said. Well crap.]
Um...er, I do mean what I said to, about loving you.... Just don't make me repeat it. It's sort of embarrassing.
Re: [Action]
4/10/14 03:21 (UTC)Ok, I will. I promise. I... just don't want to hurt you. And don't worry. You don't have to say it over and over again. I know.
...Neither of us is good at this, Asuka. You don't have to try to be. I didn't choose you because you were great at this sort of thing. I don't fall for those people.
[They were just quick snacks.]
Re: [Action]
4/10/14 03:36 (UTC)You don't have to rub it in. [Asuka laughed awkwardly.] But I know and I'm happy that your willing to put up with me like this. I appreciate it.
[And a kiss on the forehead, to make up for the one that had been interrupted by depressing talk earlier.]
[Action]
4/10/14 13:27 (UTC)Not put up with. I like some of these things about you. A lot. Normal's boring.
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4/10/14 19:43 (UTC)The Eva pilot offered another kiss, this time on the lips, just lingering for a moment before pulling away to speak.]
I don't think I'd even know what it felt like to be normal. So I guess that is a good thing.
[Action]
5/10/14 03:44 (UTC)[Hey, they got through the "I just died" conversation surprisingly well...]
Re: [Action]
5/10/14 03:56 (UTC)[It is a bit hard to think of someone as having died if your currently cuddling with them on the coach.]
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5/10/14 19:47 (UTC)I'm such an awful person, stealing all your firsts like this. And I don't even regret a moment of it anymore.
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5/10/14 20:05 (UTC)That last comment however, caused Asuka's stare in confusion at Samantha As she wondered just what the demon girl meant by that.]
Does that mean there was a time you did regret it?
[That sort of phrasing does beg the question, and Asuka was not one to let that sort of notion slide without an answer.]
Re: [Action]
5/10/14 20:27 (UTC)I... don't like the idea of someone's first time being with someone who they're food for. But, I'd like to think I made it special for you.
Re: [Action]
5/10/14 20:36 (UTC)[Asuka sighed a bit, feel a little like an ass for having asked. She remembered back when things weren't like they were now. She didn't mind the arrangement. But it was just...different, to say the least. She liked the present far more, much as she had admitted in a sob during her confession sometime back.]
It was fine. It was a little awkward on my part, but I enjoyed myself and we have a good thing going now. So don't worry about it.
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6/10/14 01:03 (UTC)I don't think either of us is really that good at "Not worrying about it," but thank you Asuka. I appreciate it. It has been good... really good.
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6/10/14 01:39 (UTC)[She nuzzled against Samantha again. Happy, sort-of normal moments like these were rare, so she wanted to enjoy it as much as she could.]
Same for me. This isn't what I pictured my first relationship being like, but I still don't think that I'd ask for something different like ever.
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